+ where to go from here:
I am -
being my own best friend.
being my biggest fan and committed supporter.
being my most loyal of lovers.
I have learned to be all of these things to myself in preparation of being a friend, support and love to others. I have never trusted any man or woman who relies on others for happiness or wholeness.
If you’re a young woman from any background, and he’s educated or athletic or wears glasses or is a business man or he possesses a degree or he is articulate or a family man or well-liked in the community or believes in God or is “too handsome to need to force a woman into sex” - it is likely that they will attempt to silence you.
You don’t have to accept it.
Tell your story. Share your truths. He/they cannot continue to violate our space/bodies/womanhood.
There is no shame in your honesty.
final note to clark
by lucille clifton
they had it wrong,
the old comics.
you are only clark kent
after all. oh,
mild mannered mister,
why did i think you could fix it?
how you must have wondered
to see me taking chances,
dancing on the edge of words,
pointing out the bad guys,
dreaming your x-ray vision
could see the beauty in me.
what did i expect? what
did i hope for? we are who we are,
two faithful readers,
not wonder woman and not superman.
One day I came to an alarming realization. I looked into the mirror and said to myself, “I don’t know this woman.”
I had not written in months, my hair was pulled into a lifeless ponytail, my social life had become uncharacteristically mediocre, there were no stories behind my eyes.
That’s the moment my life changed. I was returning. I hugged myself and exclaimed, “It’s so good to see you again.”